Self-esteem and child

Self-esteem is a person's core belief about himself or herself. A person's self-esteem is reflected in his or her actions, both in how as well as what he or she does. Although self-esteem varies from time to time, the pattern usually leans toward a healthy or unhealthy view of self. With healthy self-esteem, a person is more likely to succeed in life.

Although building self-esteem is a lifelong process, the foundation of self-esteem is established in childhood. That foundation can do much to help a child deal with difficult life issues as they are encountered.

Parents have the greatest influence on a child's belief about himself or herself. Letting your child know that he or she belongs, is doing well, and is contributing can help him or her develop healthy self-esteem.

Keep these things in mind as you raise your child.

    * Children sense that they belong by the way their parents talk to them and act toward them. Show and tell your child that you love and care for him or her.
    * Children learn about how well they are doing by how their parents react to their behavior. Offer praise at least twice as often as you criticize (and try for four times as often).
    * Children learn how to work with others by learning how to cooperate within a family. Give your child some age-appropriate household responsibilities.

Self-esteem affects all aspects—personal, family, and social—of a person's life. Adults who have low self-esteem feel that they do not belong, that they cannot learn and accomplish things, and that they do not have anything to contribute. They are handicapped in their ability to do well in the world.

On the other hand, adults who have healthy self-esteem are well equipped to succeed in life. They have the confidence to try new things and learn new skills. They are responsible adults, are able to cooperate well with others, and are happy.

    * Helping your child feel that he or she has a place in your family will contribute to his or her ability to become a responsible adult.
    * Helping your child feel that he or she has the ability to learn will contribute to his or her confidence in developing new skills throughout life.
    * Helping your child feel that he or she can contribute to the family as a whole will make your child more likely to cooperate with other people and find ways to contribute to the well-being of his or her group or to society.

Contributing:

Contributing enhances our feelings of belonging, providing the basis for continued learning and strengthening of self-esteem. Every day, use the following suggestions to help your child feel that he or she is contributing. Asked your doctor, when you can find a good medication online pharmacy.

    * Set family rules. Family rules help children know that the family stands for something and gives them exposure to order and ritual. Have as few family rules as possible and enforce them consistently.
    * Invite cooperation. Regular family meetings are a way to help children learn to cooperate. Family meetings are a place where family members discuss concerns and problems.
    * Expect accountability. You can help your child learn to be responsible by assigning him or her some household chores. Make sure the chores are appropriate for your child's age. As your child grows, hold your child accountable for his or her choices and behavior and let your child experience natural or logical consequences.
    * Express appreciation. Let your child know you appreciate his or her help with tasks, even household chores.

You may want to keep a journal when you are starting to use this method. Each day for at least 3 weeks, write in your journal specifically how you helped your child develop a sense of belonging, learning, and contributing. Keeping a journal for an extended period of time will help encourage positive behavior. After 3 weeks, review your notes to see your child's progress and to identify new ways to help your child.